So many wedding shows on WE. What does WE stand for anyway? I could google it, but I'm too lazy to alt-tab google.com. Tired.
Maybe when I'm less tired I'll go to theknot.com and build my fantasy wedding. I've heard that's a good thing to do - construct the wedding of your dreams, then implement your budget, hacking and slashing till you've got something realistic. It is probable that you will retain at least some elements of your pie-in-the sky wedding.
ps the problem with a lot of wedding attire sites is that they don't list the prices. stupid.
Wednesday, December 12, 2007
Saturday, December 8, 2007
sigh
Dress shopping was ... intoxicating. The more gowns I tried on, the drunker I got.
Also tried on some awesome ones at a different place that wouldn't allow pictures.
And what's this nonsense I was spewing about not needing a veil? I loved the veil. What I did not love about the veil was its price. What is up with $200 for a piece of tulle? Nvm, jury's still out on the veil.
Advice for wedding dress browsers:
- Wear an outfit that doesn't require a bra so when trying on backless stuff, no bra lines.
- Makeup. Good boutique lighting can only do so much.
- Everything looks schmaltzy in its vinyl cocoon. Let them take it out of the bag.
- Call ahead and ask if you'll be allowed to photograph yourself in the dresses you try on. You might want to skip the ones who say no, at least early on.
Also tried on some awesome ones at a different place that wouldn't allow pictures.
And what's this nonsense I was spewing about not needing a veil? I loved the veil. What I did not love about the veil was its price. What is up with $200 for a piece of tulle? Nvm, jury's still out on the veil.
Advice for wedding dress browsers:
- Wear an outfit that doesn't require a bra so when trying on backless stuff, no bra lines.
- Makeup. Good boutique lighting can only do so much.
- Everything looks schmaltzy in its vinyl cocoon. Let them take it out of the bag.
- Call ahead and ask if you'll be allowed to photograph yourself in the dresses you try on. You might want to skip the ones who say no, at least early on.
Thursday, November 29, 2007
tabling the issue
Today I discovered Oneida.com. OoooOOOooo.
I've always liked setting a nice table - my favorite table ever was Bon's bridal shower table(s) at L'Uraku. Motif: polychrome paradise (I miss those umbrellas.) Each guest had a different colored napkin, and either a blue or green gift bag by her plate. I arranged red, yellow and pink rose petals down the center of the table. It sounds like a big color-mess but in the mid-morning light, and with L'Uraku's decor, it looked very pretty.
I've long been a fan of Pier 1 and have purchased many an odd piece of dinnerware from the Ward location - a rectangular orange and red dish with an elephant on it, cereal bowls, a pair of sterile white plates big enough to tap dance on, a really big mug. I bought my first placemats and cloth napkins (orange with embroidered dragonflies) from Pier 1.
My second favorite table made use of those placemats and napkins - had some friends over and cooked up an outdoor dinner for four. White plates, orange mats and napkins, a few fat candles. Such ceremony. When was the last time I had those friends over? Um, had 'em over the new place for a Passion Party, and the majority of people had to sit on the floor. I think I served frozen lasagna on paper plates.
I no longer have a dining table. I have a table that used to be used for mealtimes and now holds more crap than you can shake a stick at. It's been converted to the "computer table." We eat on the couch in front of the TV. I have a wrought iron-looking thing that I bought on a whim from Ross because I thought it would look so awesome on my lanai. We used to eat outside at this table. Even though it had an inconvenient design (spaces big enough for your fork to fall through, for instance) at least it was a table to eat at.
Anyway this was supposed to be about dinnerware. Oneida.com - hm, maybe we should register for china. It's not china in the stuffy, Waterford sense, but modern, colorful stoneware that can be mixed and matched. True to my wacky form, though, what first caught my eye was a set of handpainted Farmhouse Rooster ware. What's not to love about a barnyard motif? Come 'n' get it.
I've always liked setting a nice table - my favorite table ever was Bon's bridal shower table(s) at L'Uraku. Motif: polychrome paradise (I miss those umbrellas.) Each guest had a different colored napkin, and either a blue or green gift bag by her plate. I arranged red, yellow and pink rose petals down the center of the table. It sounds like a big color-mess but in the mid-morning light, and with L'Uraku's decor, it looked very pretty.
I've long been a fan of Pier 1 and have purchased many an odd piece of dinnerware from the Ward location - a rectangular orange and red dish with an elephant on it, cereal bowls, a pair of sterile white plates big enough to tap dance on, a really big mug. I bought my first placemats and cloth napkins (orange with embroidered dragonflies) from Pier 1.
My second favorite table made use of those placemats and napkins - had some friends over and cooked up an outdoor dinner for four. White plates, orange mats and napkins, a few fat candles. Such ceremony. When was the last time I had those friends over? Um, had 'em over the new place for a Passion Party, and the majority of people had to sit on the floor. I think I served frozen lasagna on paper plates.
I no longer have a dining table. I have a table that used to be used for mealtimes and now holds more crap than you can shake a stick at. It's been converted to the "computer table." We eat on the couch in front of the TV. I have a wrought iron-looking thing that I bought on a whim from Ross because I thought it would look so awesome on my lanai. We used to eat outside at this table. Even though it had an inconvenient design (spaces big enough for your fork to fall through, for instance) at least it was a table to eat at.
Anyway this was supposed to be about dinnerware. Oneida.com - hm, maybe we should register for china. It's not china in the stuffy, Waterford sense, but modern, colorful stoneware that can be mixed and matched. True to my wacky form, though, what first caught my eye was a set of handpainted Farmhouse Rooster ware. What's not to love about a barnyard motif? Come 'n' get it.
Monday, November 26, 2007
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
newsies
I like this dress.
And after re-wrapping a Cinnamon Girl t-shirt for my little girl cousin for the third time, I realized that I really like tulle. Poor Scott.
My friend N has asked me to be part of her bridal party. I can't think of anything more fun. (Well, my own wedding is, in my book at least, supposed to be at least slightly more fun, but you know what I mean.) Yesterday she called to say she wasn't having a bridal party but was doing matching haku lei for her close girlfriends. I thought that was awesome but she changed her mind - yay!! I thought her original idea was sweet and simple, very original. (I was tempted to steal the "no 'maids or 'men" concept, frankly.) But am jazzed that two of my friends are getting hitched in '08 and I get front-row seats at both ceremonies.
Yep - that's about where things are right now; I'm all excited about my friends' weddings. S and I can't even book the hotel till 12 months in advance, and I feel like I can't do anything till we have the date solidified. I want to send save-the-dates but what if ours is snagged? I want to shop for dresses but it feels wrong like what if we end up with a much later date and my tastes change and yada yada yada.
Yada.
Oh yeah we (WE!!) watched 3+ episodes of "Bridezillas" last night. I turned to S several times and said, "Aren't you glad you're marrying ME?" With hundreds of thousands of dollars to spend on a wedding alone, people become slightly insane. I'd like to think that if we had a limitless budget that we'd still keep it simple and that maybe we'd just have awesome food. And maybe a cocktail hour. Not go stupidly overboard with decorations, planners, custom made furniture, absurd cakes, etc.
Anyway, we do not have a limitless budget so that is moot. And truth be told I don't regret not being able to afford an open bar. My relationship with alcohol = tepid. It makes people stupid. I used to think that was funny. Now it worries me. I guess that's part of getting older. Besides, if you have to get drunk to endure our wedding then, um, don't come. Just send money. Hehehe.
And after re-wrapping a Cinnamon Girl t-shirt for my little girl cousin for the third time, I realized that I really like tulle. Poor Scott.
My friend N has asked me to be part of her bridal party. I can't think of anything more fun. (Well, my own wedding is, in my book at least, supposed to be at least slightly more fun, but you know what I mean.) Yesterday she called to say she wasn't having a bridal party but was doing matching haku lei for her close girlfriends. I thought that was awesome but she changed her mind - yay!! I thought her original idea was sweet and simple, very original. (I was tempted to steal the "no 'maids or 'men" concept, frankly.) But am jazzed that two of my friends are getting hitched in '08 and I get front-row seats at both ceremonies.
Yep - that's about where things are right now; I'm all excited about my friends' weddings. S and I can't even book the hotel till 12 months in advance, and I feel like I can't do anything till we have the date solidified. I want to send save-the-dates but what if ours is snagged? I want to shop for dresses but it feels wrong like what if we end up with a much later date and my tastes change and yada yada yada.
Yada.
Oh yeah we (WE!!) watched 3+ episodes of "Bridezillas" last night. I turned to S several times and said, "Aren't you glad you're marrying ME?" With hundreds of thousands of dollars to spend on a wedding alone, people become slightly insane. I'd like to think that if we had a limitless budget that we'd still keep it simple and that maybe we'd just have awesome food. And maybe a cocktail hour. Not go stupidly overboard with decorations, planners, custom made furniture, absurd cakes, etc.
Anyway, we do not have a limitless budget so that is moot. And truth be told I don't regret not being able to afford an open bar. My relationship with alcohol = tepid. It makes people stupid. I used to think that was funny. Now it worries me. I guess that's part of getting older. Besides, if you have to get drunk to endure our wedding then, um, don't come. Just send money. Hehehe.
Sunday, November 11, 2007
Wednesday, November 7, 2007
cookieeeeeee
Geri just gave me some fortune cookies her daughter, Michele, used as favors. Her theme was wine, and the cookies were brown (chocolate) and red (sort of fruit loop-flavored) ... SO PRETTY, and so tasty. Of course the fortune was a custom-designed slip of paper that said thank you from the couple ... cute.
Cookies. See, I get so distracted by all the fun stuff when I should be planning out the who, the when, and the where. Instead, I get all caught up in discussions about back in the day when people put homemade fruitcake in hand-folded, printed boxes as favors. (I like fruitcake, so this is very appealing to me.) Veil, no veil? Chocolate cake? Two attendants or three? Mannerless friends and well-behaved near-strangers: invite both, or neither? Theme. Budget. Family. Scalloped invitations.
Le sigh. See? Concentrate on cookies. It's less of a headache.
Cookies. See, I get so distracted by all the fun stuff when I should be planning out the who, the when, and the where. Instead, I get all caught up in discussions about back in the day when people put homemade fruitcake in hand-folded, printed boxes as favors. (I like fruitcake, so this is very appealing to me.) Veil, no veil? Chocolate cake? Two attendants or three? Mannerless friends and well-behaved near-strangers: invite both, or neither? Theme. Budget. Family. Scalloped invitations.
Le sigh. See? Concentrate on cookies. It's less of a headache.
Tuesday, November 6, 2007
updates ...
- I like this.
- I like that.
- I LIKE being engaged.
- No date yet.
- No venue yet.
- No RUSH yet.
- I love my Club Wedd planner.
- I love my shiny shiny ring.
- I LOVE my fiance.
Thursday, November 1, 2007
Monday, October 29, 2007
Doing the numbers the other night, disheartening as the (hypothetical) figures were, made me feel better. I guess it's because numbers keep everything real and grounded, not pie-in-the-sky. Yes, it'll be difficult, but it's for a purpose (thanks Dan).
Purpose: to kill everyone by walking down the aisle in THIS! ... just kidding. Although it is gorgeous:
Purpose: to kill everyone by walking down the aisle in THIS! ... just kidding. Although it is gorgeous:
I dreamed last night that my baby turned into a great big meanie. Not a smack-his-bitch-up meanie, but a total uncaring clod. ODD DREAM.
P.S. Stupid Target.com won't ship the planner to Hawaii (apparently they won't ship anything heavier than a sweater to the isles) so Leecie is picking one up for me in one of their stores and mailing it to me. Yay for Leecie!
Saturday, October 27, 2007
getting funny with money
Skipped this weekend's bridal expo. It would have been fun, but with something like $12 in my checking account, now is not the time to get razzle-dazzled by taffeta or seascapes. Now is the time to get serious about everything money-related.
(Getting serious made me sad, so I visited color swatches at Alfred Angelo and discovered some cutie stuff in their "Dream in Color" line.)
Just kidding about being sad, but not kidding about budgeting. For "fun" I did some loose budgeting, starting with my take-home and deducting mortgage, association and maintenance fees, electric, and general expenses. If I subtracted and divided correctly, it would take me 138 months to save up enough to pay for what in this state is considered a "modest" wedding.
Some points to consider (and this is all hypothetical of course, because 138 months is stupid):
- The above figuring assumes that between now and the end of 138 months I eat even less than I do now, drive about half as much as I currently do, and make no extraneous purchases. Sweater on sale? IGNORE. Pack of gum? FORGET IT. Jamba Juice? NYET. Yoga pants from Sam's Club that they never have in your size except today? WALK AWAY.
- I budgeted so the cat and dog can still eat like furry little vacuum cleaners, but they'd better not get sick because that's going to throw everything off.
- The above figuring does not factor in the following: wedding dress, attendants' attire, floral arrangements, or honeymoon.
- The above figuring does factor in the following: reception music by BROTHER WITH iPOD AND SPEAKERS, hair by ME AND MY FLATIRON, and rehearsal dinner by YOUR HIBACHI AND MINE.
Okay, that was fun (no really, it was ... and seriously, the iPOD and speakers, I think, is a fabulous idea. If all we had to rent were ass-kicking speakers? Hey. Oh, and by the way, the last time my flatiron and I did serious work together, I met and snagged my future fiance. Hee hee.)
Now let's re-calculate with S and I sharing the cost. That's either 69 months of ultra-frugal behavior on both our parts or 138 months of not-so-tight behavior. Now let's recalculate with my parents contributing 25 percent. It would still take me 52 months (or a little over four years) to come up with the $9375 left. (All of this, take note, assumes the scenario in which my parents magically and instantaneously pay 25 percent, S and I contribute equally and at the same rate toward the other 75 percent.)
I have several things to say about this.
One, yikes. Two, thank God for credit cards. Three, one of the main reasons the amount I can put away monthly (according to my trying-to-be-realistic calculations) is a paltry $180, is because I have a whopping mortgage payment that pretty much sucks me dry each month. So, while if we had no credit and had to come up with all the cash we needed before planning we would not get married for several years, at least we would have a place to live in the interim. Four, yay for ramen and Hot Pockets. Five, I just put my beloved chaise on Craigslist and that's only so I can pay off what I already have sitting on my credit cards. Six, 2009 has a nice ring to it, I guess. Seven, when I was in college I had several paraprofessional educator jobs, the income from which could have paid for two-thirds of the "modest" wedding. Not to make myself sick or anything.
Okie, enough thinking for one night.
(Getting serious made me sad, so I visited color swatches at Alfred Angelo and discovered some cutie stuff in their "Dream in Color" line.)
Just kidding about being sad, but not kidding about budgeting. For "fun" I did some loose budgeting, starting with my take-home and deducting mortgage, association and maintenance fees, electric, and general expenses. If I subtracted and divided correctly, it would take me 138 months to save up enough to pay for what in this state is considered a "modest" wedding.
Some points to consider (and this is all hypothetical of course, because 138 months is stupid):
- The above figuring assumes that between now and the end of 138 months I eat even less than I do now, drive about half as much as I currently do, and make no extraneous purchases. Sweater on sale? IGNORE. Pack of gum? FORGET IT. Jamba Juice? NYET. Yoga pants from Sam's Club that they never have in your size except today? WALK AWAY.
- I budgeted so the cat and dog can still eat like furry little vacuum cleaners, but they'd better not get sick because that's going to throw everything off.
- The above figuring does not factor in the following: wedding dress, attendants' attire, floral arrangements, or honeymoon.
- The above figuring does factor in the following: reception music by BROTHER WITH iPOD AND SPEAKERS, hair by ME AND MY FLATIRON, and rehearsal dinner by YOUR HIBACHI AND MINE.
Okay, that was fun (no really, it was ... and seriously, the iPOD and speakers, I think, is a fabulous idea. If all we had to rent were ass-kicking speakers? Hey. Oh, and by the way, the last time my flatiron and I did serious work together, I met and snagged my future fiance. Hee hee.)
Now let's re-calculate with S and I sharing the cost. That's either 69 months of ultra-frugal behavior on both our parts or 138 months of not-so-tight behavior. Now let's recalculate with my parents contributing 25 percent. It would still take me 52 months (or a little over four years) to come up with the $9375 left. (All of this, take note, assumes the scenario in which my parents magically and instantaneously pay 25 percent, S and I contribute equally and at the same rate toward the other 75 percent.)
I have several things to say about this.
One, yikes. Two, thank God for credit cards. Three, one of the main reasons the amount I can put away monthly (according to my trying-to-be-realistic calculations) is a paltry $180, is because I have a whopping mortgage payment that pretty much sucks me dry each month. So, while if we had no credit and had to come up with all the cash we needed before planning we would not get married for several years, at least we would have a place to live in the interim. Four, yay for ramen and Hot Pockets. Five, I just put my beloved chaise on Craigslist and that's only so I can pay off what I already have sitting on my credit cards. Six, 2009 has a nice ring to it, I guess. Seven, when I was in college I had several paraprofessional educator jobs, the income from which could have paid for two-thirds of the "modest" wedding. Not to make myself sick or anything.
Okie, enough thinking for one night.
Thursday, October 25, 2007
the fun part
Went over to Leecie's brother's last night ... All three brothers, plus their awesome mom, plus Rolando (old friend) and his daughter were there. Of course, so was fiance Daniel, and Kuma the big slobbery pony-dog. Daniel was playing that card game with Hi'iaka, the one where you lick the card, stick it to your forehead, and make bets with each other. You'd have to LOVE kids to endure this game with one who doesn't understand the rules for as long as he did.
So she showed me the organizer, some dress ideas, and her so-far plans with the hotel - all the while expressing (repeatedly) her pity for me because my wedding is going to be much, much larger than hers. There was a time that the sympathy would have gone in the opposite direction, but as they say, reality bites. So do reception site costs.
Decisions We have made so far:
To get married.
Decisions We still need to make:
Where? When? How? Before whom? By whom?
Food? Drinks? Decor?
How much to spend? What not to bother with?
Decisions I still need to make:
Change my name to ...? (because it used to be just "Change my name?")
Traditional dress or What I Really Want?
Yeah. So far, I've perused David's Bridal and have purchased the planner. And that's it. And that's okay.
P.S. All and sundry are trying to talk me into 2009.
So she showed me the organizer, some dress ideas, and her so-far plans with the hotel - all the while expressing (repeatedly) her pity for me because my wedding is going to be much, much larger than hers. There was a time that the sympathy would have gone in the opposite direction, but as they say, reality bites. So do reception site costs.
Decisions We have made so far:
To get married.
Decisions We still need to make:
Where? When? How? Before whom? By whom?
Food? Drinks? Decor?
How much to spend? What not to bother with?
Decisions I still need to make:
Change my name to ...? (because it used to be just "Change my name?")
Traditional dress or What I Really Want?
Yeah. So far, I've perused David's Bridal and have purchased the planner. And that's it. And that's okay.
P.S. All and sundry are trying to talk me into 2009.
Monday, October 22, 2007
ahaha
A running log of reactions to our (piecemeal) engagement announcement:
"Did you tell him you need a few days to think about it?" - my mom
"Wait! What? You guys are married?" - his mom
"Cool!" - my brother
"I'm sorry." - his brother-in-law
"OooOOooo." - my sisky-in-law
"Did you tell him you need a few days to think about it?" - my mom
"Wait! What? You guys are married?" - his mom
"Cool!" - my brother
"I'm sorry." - his brother-in-law
"OooOOooo." - my sisky-in-law
giddy, yup
My GL partner is engaged, too. It's like a fever around here! Had dinner with Lisa and Bon (plus sig-ots) the other night ... This IS the fun part, and gosh darnit, I'm going to enjoy it. Soon enough we'll dig in and plan, but not just yet. P.S. Hooray for these! <--- Hehehe.
serenity prayer
Like I need another blog.
I can't sleep. Could be the past three days' nonstop eating; could be our first purposeful wedding discussion and its subsequent stomachache. The topic, by the way, was The Date. Don't wanna go into it, really, but after some thought and a few deep, determined breaths, here's a preliminary list of what I want for our wedding:
- For S and me to remain at its center
- For our family and friends to have a positively memorable time
- For the finished product to reflect love, not obligation
- Utter simplicity
Tall order. But that's what I want. Details like a date that doesn't suck, a makeup artist who shows up on time, and an excellent menu will all fall into one of the aforementioned categories. I want my hair in a half-ponytail. I want at least one of those glass-clinking kisses to be shared by every couple in attendance. I don't want my dress to touch the ground. I don't want to wear white shoes. But above all, I don't want to be swept away by details that really don't matter.
Just before bed, we talked and S said that he didn't know that stuff had to be planned right away. What a great feeling to remind him, and myself, that it doesn't. We just got engaged. And I'm the luckiest person in the world. I can still hear myself say to a good friend, months and months back, that I knew that I could marry S then and there, with no ring, and no huge ceremony - just him and me, living in the moment and looking forward to forever.
So if we wait till 2009, or have that ideal 2008 wedding, or if we get married tomorrow, the end result will be the same: We'll be together.
Deep breaths.
:)
I can't sleep. Could be the past three days' nonstop eating; could be our first purposeful wedding discussion and its subsequent stomachache. The topic, by the way, was The Date. Don't wanna go into it, really, but after some thought and a few deep, determined breaths, here's a preliminary list of what I want for our wedding:
- For S and me to remain at its center
- For our family and friends to have a positively memorable time
- For the finished product to reflect love, not obligation
- Utter simplicity
Tall order. But that's what I want. Details like a date that doesn't suck, a makeup artist who shows up on time, and an excellent menu will all fall into one of the aforementioned categories. I want my hair in a half-ponytail. I want at least one of those glass-clinking kisses to be shared by every couple in attendance. I don't want my dress to touch the ground. I don't want to wear white shoes. But above all, I don't want to be swept away by details that really don't matter.
Just before bed, we talked and S said that he didn't know that stuff had to be planned right away. What a great feeling to remind him, and myself, that it doesn't. We just got engaged. And I'm the luckiest person in the world. I can still hear myself say to a good friend, months and months back, that I knew that I could marry S then and there, with no ring, and no huge ceremony - just him and me, living in the moment and looking forward to forever.
So if we wait till 2009, or have that ideal 2008 wedding, or if we get married tomorrow, the end result will be the same: We'll be together.
Deep breaths.
:)
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